If you’re on the hunt for a hotel experience that’s both laughably bad and utterly unforgettable, look no further.
First, let’s talk about the check-in process, which could double as an endurance test. After a grueling journey, we arrived only to be left in lobby limbo for 2.5 hours. I started to wonder if they were handcrafting our room just for us, one brick at a time. Spoiler alert: they weren’t.
The bed in our room was a broken, sloping into a V-shape that forced us to cuddle whether we liked it or not. Each movement triggered a cacophony of squeaks, We didn't sleep; we just tried to find the least uncomfortable position and prayed for dawn.
The decor was an eclectic mix of "abandoned warehouse" and "crime scene." Stains on the floor and bedding told stories we didn’t want to hear.
The bathroom was a real treat. The door didn’t lock, adding a touch of voyeuristic thrill to our stay. We’d been promised a bath, but that was as elusive as hot water. Speaking of which, our showers were an invigorating plunge into hypothermia.
The room’s smell could The room’s smell could only be described as "mystery meets mildew." It’s the kind of aroma that makes you question your life choices. And for those who appreciate vintage technology, the TV wasn’t flat screen. It was a bulky relic from the past, like the rest of the room’s décor.
Trying to reach the owners was as fruitless as finding a clean spot on the carpet. It’s as if they knew better than to stay there themselves.